Grandfather, April 2014.
A couple of years back I had pretty much lost myself.
I had lost the idea of who I am. I had lost the idea of who I’d become. And I had lost the idea of where I’m actually coming from.
I went on doing things. Most of them I need people or photos to remind me of. I went on inhaling and exhaling. I went on for months and had made sure that in the end I would come back to an idea of myself.
Today something happened that made my heart stop for a second. And that made me think back to these days when with shaking hands I was wandering through life not knowing the importance of, well, basically anything. But mostly the importance of companionship and trust.
I missed out on saying ‘I love you. And I trust you.’ way too much in these past years. I still do, sometimes, but I promise, I’ll be trying harder not to. And so should you.
(And thank you, Granddad, for letting me take that picture of you earlier this year. For letting me capture a moment of ease and joy even though I know you disliked me for insisting. I love you.)